A joke, for no reason

Shane Ferguson

Los Angeles had a desert version of the Catskills called Murietta Hot Springs with mud baths and water that smelled like rotten eggs.

When you had a phone call it was a very big deal because it was long distance and the clerk would call you on the loud speaker. "Telephone call for Abe Gitlin," etc.

One day everyone was surprised by an announcement, "Telephone call for Shane Ferguson." "Telephone call for Shane Ferguson."

Several people went to the front desk to get a look at Shane Ferguson and were even more curious when an old Jewish gentleman responded to the paging.

After his call, one of the budinskis asked the man how he came to be named Shane Ferguson. Shane replied that his name in the old country was Motl Rosenschweig.

"My uncle, who was in America 10 years before me, told me to tell immigration that my name was Morris Rose. I practiced saying my new name for the entire trip on the boat. I asked the American sailors to say it for me and learned to pronounce it. I was standing in line at the immigration for two hours, worrying about everything, when the officer finally asked me my name, I said, "Schane fergessen." (Yiddish: "I forgot already") so that's what the immigration man wrote.

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And now, a footnote, showing that life is sometimes stranger than fiction.

My father's first wife was the daughter of Russian immigrants - her father's name was Edward Moss, not a very Russian name.

The story is passed down in the family that when they got to Ellis Island, not speaking a word of English, the wife kept pointing to her husband and saying "меня муж" (menya moozh = my husband). It would be more common to say "мои муж" or "муж меня", but my Russian-speaking informants tell me that what she said is well within the realm of possibility.

So here sits the low-paid INS functionary, and he writes down what he thinks he heard.  And voilà! Edward Moss is born, and we have no idea what the original family name was.

♬Strange things happen in this world♬