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Sep. 16th, 2012
Please Claim It Out Now (Nigerian Scam)
Sep. 16th, 2012 07:16 amSubject: Winning Notification From Nokia
Date: Sun, 16 Sep 2012 15:03:04 +0800
DON'T MISS THIS CHANCE ! CONTACT NOW!
A Great Offer From Nokia & GLF!
Contact Immediately for the claim of your US$50,000.00, your email id have won for you in this our yearly anniverssary! This is also part of our relief operation and encourage people
to be using NOKIA. Your email id was selected amongs the 10 lucky winners worldwide
in our Electronic Email ballot which was assisted by social Network services and email id providers. Your Winning Ref.NK900AC28
CONGRATULATIONS!
DO NOT MISS THIS ,CONTACT YOUR FUND PROCESSING
MANAGER IMMEDIATELY .
Mr. Steve Smith.Email. (stevesmith@globallinkfinances.com)
Click HERE To Contact Your Claims Agent for further directives and claim with
Your Full Name, Complete Address, Age, Sex and Phone number.
Please claim it out today, this is a limited offer !
Congratulations!
Customers Service
Copyright © 2021 NOKIA UK GLOBAL LOTTERY
This communication the property of Nokia Mobile Corporation in association with GLF and is intended for the use of the recipient to which it is addressed regarding his won promotional prize, and may contain confidential, personal, and or privileged information. Please contact us immediately if you are not the intended recipient of this communication, and do not copy, distribute, or take action relying on it. Any communication received in error, or subsequent reply, should be deleted or destroyed.
A message from nine years in the future!
Date: Sun, 16 Sep 2012 15:03:04 +0800
DON'T MISS THIS CHANCE ! CONTACT NOW!
A Great Offer From Nokia & GLF!
Contact Immediately for the claim of your US$50,000.00, your email id have won for you in this our yearly anniverssary! This is also part of our relief operation and encourage people
to be using NOKIA. Your email id was selected amongs the 10 lucky winners worldwide
in our Electronic Email ballot which was assisted by social Network services and email id providers. Your Winning Ref.NK900AC28
CONGRATULATIONS!
DO NOT MISS THIS ,CONTACT YOUR FUND PROCESSING
MANAGER IMMEDIATELY .
Mr. Steve Smith.Email. (stevesmith@globallinkfinances.com)
Click HERE To Contact Your Claims Agent for further directives and claim with
Your Full Name, Complete Address, Age, Sex and Phone number.
Please claim it out today, this is a limited offer !
Congratulations!
Customers Service
Copyright © 2021 NOKIA UK GLOBAL LOTTERY
This communication the property of Nokia Mobile Corporation in association with GLF and is intended for the use of the recipient to which it is addressed regarding his won promotional prize, and may contain confidential, personal, and or privileged information. Please contact us immediately if you are not the intended recipient of this communication, and do not copy, distribute, or take action relying on it. Any communication received in error, or subsequent reply, should be deleted or destroyed.
A message from nine years in the future!
Hazard-Fraught Tools
Sep. 16th, 2012 07:39 amI need to go shopping, that's all there is to it.
(These were originally published in MAD Magazine #515, June 2012 - Writer: Scott Maiko, Artist: Scott Bricher)
(These were originally published in MAD Magazine #515, June 2012 - Writer: Scott Maiko, Artist: Scott Bricher)
In the closing pages of Robin Cook's Fatal Cure, we learn that the evil hospital administrator bastards who have been killing people with massive doses of gamma radiation (because they were using too many hospital resources) come to a satisfyingly karmic end.
---------------
Scanning the cluttered conference table, David spotted the source instantly. It was a cylinder about a foot long whose diameter matched the size of the bore in the treatment arm he'd examined only minutes ago. Several Teflon rings were embedded in its circumference. On its top was a locking pin. The cylinder was standing upright next to a model of a parking garage just as Van Slyke had indicated.
David started for the cylinder, clutching a lead apron in both hands.
"Stop!" Traynor yelled.
Before David could get to the cylinder, Caldwell leapt to his feet and grabbed David around his chest.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Caldwell demanded.
"I'm trying to save all of you if it isn't too late," David said.
"Let him go," Angela cried.
"What are you talking about?" Traynor demanded.
David nodded toward the cylinder. "I'm afraid you have been having your meeting around a cobalt-60 source."
Cantor leaped to his feet; his chair tipped over backward. "I saw that thing," he cried. "I wondered what it was." Saying no more, he turned and fled from the room.
A stunned Caldwell relaxed his grip. David immediately lunged across the table and snatched up the brass cylinder in his lead gloves. Then he rolled the cylinder in one of his lead aprons. Next he wrapped that apron in another and that one in another still. He proceeded to do the same with the aprons Angela was carrying while she stepped out of the conference room to get the others. David was anxious to cover the cylinder with as many layers of lead as possible.
As David was wrapping the last load of the aprons around the bulky parcel, Angela got the Geiger counter.
"I don't believe you," Traynor said, breaking a shocked silence. But his voice lacked conviction. Cantor's sudden departure had unnerved him.
"This is not the time for debate," David said. "Everyone better get out of here," he added. "You've all been exposed to a serious amount of radiation. I advise you to call your doctors."
Traynor and the others exchanged nervous glances. Panic soon broke out as first a few and then the remaining board members, including Traynor, ran from the room.
David finished with the last apron and took the Geiger counter. Turning it on, he was dismayed to see that it still registered a significant amount of radiation.
"Let's get out of here," David said. "That's about all we can do."
Leaving the cylinder wrapped in aprons on the table, they went out of the conference room, closing the doors behind them. David tried the Geiger counter again. As he expected, the radiation had fallen off dramatically. "As long as no one goes in the conference room, no one else will get hurt tonight," he said.1
-------------------
All of the criminals die horribly, of radiation poisoning.
{Evil Laugh}
Now comes the news that Halliburton has misplaced a little radioactive cylinder of its own, and it would like to have it back.
About 7 inches long, the little device is used by the oil field services company to assess potential sites for hydraulic fracturing (fracking - Google it); they lost track of it last Tuesday while trying to transport it from Pecos to a well site near Odessa 130 miles away.
"It's not something that produces radiation in an extremely dangerous form," said Chris Van Deusen, a spokesman for the Texas Department of State Health Services. "But it’s best for people to stay back, 20 or 25 feet."
Comfortingly, the cylinder is stamped with the words “danger radioactive” and “do not handle” along with a radiation warning symbol, according to the Texas Health Department.
There's just one problem.
By the time you get close enough to read that teeny-tiny writing, you've probably picked the thing up and held it about six inches from your face. Sorry, you've just fatally irradiated your brain. Sucks to be you.
I do hope they can locate this thing, before the ɑ-particles produced by americium-241 react in the presence of beryllium to form neutrons, which will promptly burn the hell out of whichever group of children picks it up and uses it to play catch with.
You know what I mean?
1Cook,Robin, Fatal Cure, Putnam, 1993
---------------
Scanning the cluttered conference table, David spotted the source instantly. It was a cylinder about a foot long whose diameter matched the size of the bore in the treatment arm he'd examined only minutes ago. Several Teflon rings were embedded in its circumference. On its top was a locking pin. The cylinder was standing upright next to a model of a parking garage just as Van Slyke had indicated.
David started for the cylinder, clutching a lead apron in both hands.
"Stop!" Traynor yelled.
Before David could get to the cylinder, Caldwell leapt to his feet and grabbed David around his chest.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Caldwell demanded.
"I'm trying to save all of you if it isn't too late," David said.
"Let him go," Angela cried.
"What are you talking about?" Traynor demanded.
David nodded toward the cylinder. "I'm afraid you have been having your meeting around a cobalt-60 source."
Cantor leaped to his feet; his chair tipped over backward. "I saw that thing," he cried. "I wondered what it was." Saying no more, he turned and fled from the room.
A stunned Caldwell relaxed his grip. David immediately lunged across the table and snatched up the brass cylinder in his lead gloves. Then he rolled the cylinder in one of his lead aprons. Next he wrapped that apron in another and that one in another still. He proceeded to do the same with the aprons Angela was carrying while she stepped out of the conference room to get the others. David was anxious to cover the cylinder with as many layers of lead as possible.
As David was wrapping the last load of the aprons around the bulky parcel, Angela got the Geiger counter.
"I don't believe you," Traynor said, breaking a shocked silence. But his voice lacked conviction. Cantor's sudden departure had unnerved him.
"This is not the time for debate," David said. "Everyone better get out of here," he added. "You've all been exposed to a serious amount of radiation. I advise you to call your doctors."
Traynor and the others exchanged nervous glances. Panic soon broke out as first a few and then the remaining board members, including Traynor, ran from the room.
David finished with the last apron and took the Geiger counter. Turning it on, he was dismayed to see that it still registered a significant amount of radiation.
"Let's get out of here," David said. "That's about all we can do."
Leaving the cylinder wrapped in aprons on the table, they went out of the conference room, closing the doors behind them. David tried the Geiger counter again. As he expected, the radiation had fallen off dramatically. "As long as no one goes in the conference room, no one else will get hurt tonight," he said.1
-------------------
All of the criminals die horribly, of radiation poisoning.
{Evil Laugh}Now comes the news that Halliburton has misplaced a little radioactive cylinder of its own, and it would like to have it back.
About 7 inches long, the little device is used by the oil field services company to assess potential sites for hydraulic fracturing (fracking - Google it); they lost track of it last Tuesday while trying to transport it from Pecos to a well site near Odessa 130 miles away.
"It's not something that produces radiation in an extremely dangerous form," said Chris Van Deusen, a spokesman for the Texas Department of State Health Services. "But it’s best for people to stay back, 20 or 25 feet."
Comfortingly, the cylinder is stamped with the words “danger radioactive” and “do not handle” along with a radiation warning symbol, according to the Texas Health Department.
There's just one problem.
By the time you get close enough to read that teeny-tiny writing, you've probably picked the thing up and held it about six inches from your face. Sorry, you've just fatally irradiated your brain. Sucks to be you.
I do hope they can locate this thing, before the ɑ-particles produced by americium-241 react in the presence of beryllium to form neutrons, which will promptly burn the hell out of whichever group of children picks it up and uses it to play catch with.
You know what I mean?
1Cook,Robin, Fatal Cure, Putnam, 1993
The Boston Molassacre
Sep. 16th, 2012 02:52 pm
From Wikipedia:
"On January 15, 1919, a molasses tank at 529 Commercial Street exploded under pressure, killing 21 people and injuring 150. A 40-foot wave of molasses buckled the elevated railroad tracks, crushed buildings and inundated the neighborhood. Structural defects in the tank combined with unseasonably warm temperatures contributed to the disaster."
The thought of a 40-foot wall of goo from a collapsed tank holding 2.3 million gallons of molasses is almost impossible to process. The pictures below give an idea of the havoc that was unleashed.
Damage to the El as a result of the flood. (Wikimedia Commons)
Aftermath of the flood
This map shows the area affected (Wikimedia Commons)
Firemen stand knee-deep in molasses after the explosion. Copyright © Leslie Jones. Courtesy of the Boston Public Library, Leslie Jones Collection.
About a month ago, an almost-empty jar of molasses leaked onto a shelf in our kitchen. It took me an hour to clean up the mess. Yet, astonishingly, 300 people were able to clean up the disaster in about two weeks, putting in over 87,000 man-hours.
Some folks say that on a hot summer day, you can still smell molasses in the area. It wouldn't surprise me.
I love molasses, but not that much.
