theoldwolf

PARIS (OWN)* Crazed French workers ran amok in the streets of Paris to protest the government's proposal to raise the minimum retirement age from 43 to 45. Boulangers used week-old baguettes like sabers as they attempted to hew down legions of armored riot police, street-sweepers hurled refuse from behind Colonnes Morris, and from every darkened doorway, les concierges shouted French obscenities you would never find in "Le Petit Robert." "Arretez-les," ordered their captain, "avant qu'ils ne jettent du caca sur nos belles casques!"

Elsewhere, middle-aged workers, tired from their 3-hour workweeks, nonetheless found the energy to overturn cars and set them ablaze with their Gauloises cigarettes. "C'est inouï," said one worker to a reporter from France Presse. "Next thing you know, they will want to reduce our vacation from 3 months to two. C'est totalement inacceptable!"

French President Sarkozy was unavailable for comment, as he was vacationing on Chincoteague Island with his seven mistresses. A spokesman for the government promised to call back with an update on the official response. Right after la sièste.

*Old Wolf Network